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It's Our Story!

Hi again friends.

If you follow my story or my life, by now you would have heard about a production that my sister Nelle Lee - Shake&Stir Theatre Co. - has written and is currently playing Qpac as part of the Brisbane Festival. The show is called “Tae Tae in the Land of YAAAS” and it is inspired by real life events of yours truly. YOU GOT IT, ME – Tae! This is the most beautiful, real but magical stage show that I guarentee will bring tears and laughs and a whole lot lot of sparkle to audiences.

When I did the first read through of the script with the cast, of course I loved it and while it was brilliant, I wasn’t prepared for the multitude of emotions that it would bring up. Recalling memories of the past isn’t always a fun time, but I really do believe we have to think and talk about them sometimes to process and learn what we can from them. Having said this, as prepared as I though I was, I just didn’t expect for it to hit me so hard.

There are things in your past that you just don’t really think about, you know? You’re so busy just getting on with life to think about because your just doing it. But reading through the show made me realise just how far back in my brain I had pushed some of the not so nice things that have happened in my life. Even seeing pictures of myself after the accident, I’m usually like “oh, that poor little thing”. But the second time that I watching this show on stage, seeing it being played out in front of me, I was like “Shit Tae, that girl was you. You went through that. You experienced all these highs and lows. It’s a really weird feeling, almost like proud, tired, sad, happy, and excited all rolled into one.

So I think it’s safe to say, I’ve become a bit “yeah that happened, so what now” when I think about the accident and the impacts that it has had on my life. Which, I think is understandable right? I live it every day, I’ve told the tale many times, I’ve made speeches in front of crowds and I’ve written things to share with people. But there’s something different about seeing it from the eyes of the people that you love and that you know love you.

In the play there’s a part about my sister never having met dad. This is the part which hits me the hardest. Everytime I see the show, and I go a lot because I am just so friggen proud of it, this is the part that gets me everytime. That sister is Nelle and who she is and everything she has achieved is remarkable.

But the truth is, when it all comes down to it, the only person who could ever truly understand and fully grasp what our family went through at that time would be my mum. I was talking to mum on the phone the other day. She was telling me a little about her perspective and what she went through, and it hurt my heart. Sure, mum wasn't involved in the accident, but my mother witness the aftermath of it all, and go through it all with me - all while holding it together for the rest of her kids.

I’m not a mother, I don’t have children, so I can only imagine what it must have been like for her. To have lost her husband in one split second, to have seen her five year old daughter that morning as a happy, healthy child, and suddenly being told she may not make it through the night is something no parent should ever have to go through. My brother had also sustained injuries during the accident, she had a one year old AND she was pregnant – WTF! No one could argue with me when I say that she is an amazing, strong, resilient woman. She supported us all, got us all through it, and she is a massive, massive reason that I am who I am today.

Say love you Mum”!

I know that it affects mum when I’m self critical about the way I look or when I’m overly harsh on myself and complain about my face looking lopsided. She sees a version of that little girl who almost didn’t make it and the fight that I have been through to live an extrodary life. I sometimes forget, weirdly enough that my body has been through some pretty major shit, but mum will never forget because she was the one standing by me as my number 1 cheerleader. Through thick and thin - mum was there!

She is my Mum, she carries her own trauma of that horrible day and similar to me, she feels a little distant from her side of the story and what she went through. But she still has so many feelings and emotions attached to what her children went through. Empathy is a strange and beautiful thing.

If this show has taught me anything, it is that I am so proud of my life and my family (eventhough I already knew this).

It’s not just my story.

It's my mum’s story. My dad’s story. My siblings’ story. and everyone's story who has supported us.

It’s our story.

And it’s not over yet.



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